OK so what can I say about a Ryanair flight? ‘Not much’ you might say. I can’t tell you about the business class product, as there isn’t one. I can’t describe the amazing food offerings, as they were very limited. There are however a few things I can say, and believe me – I was just as cynical about using Ryanair as you are.
I am always amused by importance. The BA and bmi flights depart from gates near the lounges, shops and bars. AirFrance and KLM flights depart a little further away from the bars, but they have their own shop beside the gates. The Ryanair and Flybe flights always depart from the furthest gates possible. I am not sure if this is a subtle ploy to encourage their customers to drink a little less before the flight?
Anyway, there was a substantial queue of passengers in line as we arrived at the gate just in time for boarding to be announced. I couldn’t bring myself to pay to board first so I waited patiently. It was rather amusing actually. Ryanair are very, very strict about hand baggage you see. I think of the business trips I have taken with Emirates and reflect on the seemingly unlimited amount of hand baggage that they aloe you to take. It is not so here where everything has to fit into one bag, which in turn needs to fit into the gauge by the gate. When I say ‘everything’ I mean everything. Laptop, duty free purchases, handbags, iPads, jackets – everything.
It further amuses me that the Servisair staff who can be ever so polite and nice to you when you board an AF or KL flight using the Elite line, can be so evil and mean when they board a Ryanair flight.
It appears that Mrs Travel Freak and I are getting old. Old enough to be trusted not to have to squeeze our tiny carry-on bags into the gauge unlike the many, many tourists and students who may have youth, but not any trust…
We took the rear steps to board and found a row of seats that was empty and had enough overhead space for said bags. We took the seats and got ourselves comfortable.
The flight was on time. We were all loaded for our departure time and in the sky just a few minutes after – I was impressed.
Trolley service came around after about 15 minutes – at least that’s when it started. It was more than one hour after take off when the trolley finally reached me. I was thirsty – and not just for a beer. I ordered some water (3€) and asked for some Prosecco (tiny bottle – 5.50€). I was informed that there was none left. I was beginning to wish I had sat nearer the front.
I ordered a Heineken (4.50€) and a white wine for Mrs Travel Freak (5.95€), and some random snacks. All in it cost (21€). I know that we didn’t have to order any of this but consider the cost if your on a budget. Or eat a lot before you board.
The rest of the flight was pretty uneventful really. There were constant announcements from the poor staff trying to sell everything from duty free to more beer, and from scratch-cards to international phone cards.
We touched down about 15 minutes ahead of schedule. An incredibly annoying announcement (which started with a trumpet) informed us that this was another on time arrival. More than 90% of Ryanair flights arrive on time, making it the most punctual in Europe. That’s what we were told anyway.
Unfortunately the airport didn’t seem quite ready for our arrival. We waited on the ground for 15 minutes before an air bridge was attached to the front of the plane. The plane then unloaded, from the front, so by the time I got off the plane it was already way passed the scheduled arrival time. Worse still, another flight had landed just in front of us and I was now at the end of a 300+ line of passengers trying to clear passport control.
It was after 9pm by the time I made it out of the airport, but to be fair to Ryanair, this probably was out with their control.
Top tips: measure your bags. They are serious here – your bag will simply not travel. Get a seat near the front or near row 20ish (that’s where the trolleys start from). Eat before you go or bring some extra cash and bring some water regardless – you might wait a while for some on-board.
All in all – for a direct flight which cost around £80 each it was jolly good. Try it.
Departure Gate: 21 – The furthest gate possible
Arrival Gate: 50 – a good 15 minute walk to find your way out of the airport
Aircraft: Boeing 737-800
Class: Ryanair Class!
Price: Less than £100 for the flight. Plus whatever you spend on booze
Departure time: 16:45
Arrival time: 20:10 (early)
